Chantel is my niece. She’s staying home from school today so we can have a day together. Bonding. I love it. She’s a great kid. She came over the Chilkoot Trail with us in the summer. She really impressed me. How many 11-year old girls do you know who can kick butt over 3700 feet?

When she asked to come over the Pass, she kept telling us she could do it. Besides, she would get to bond with her two Aunties. She’s never really had the chance to spend quality time with us.

I told her the trail would be hard. She would get hungry and her feet would be sore–not to mention the state of her shoulders from carrying a backpack. I told her she could come if the only thing she ever said was: I’m having fun Auntie. If she were sore, or grumpy, or hungry, anything else, she would have to say those words with a forced smile and through clenched teeth.

The first day on the trail we were all staying hydrated and drinking lots of water. At one point in time, Chantel says she needs to go to the bathroom. I stop to pull out some bog roll. Redd and Jim keep going. Chantel goes into the woods. After a brief moment, she comes out again. I thought: Wow. That was fast.

Not! She says: Can you help me Auntie? I don’t know how to pee in the woods. Mum usually holds my hands so I can squat. I thought….Hmmmm. Time for you to learn how to pee in the woods Chantel. So I go into the woods with her. She wanted to bond! What better way to bond than to teach her to stand (pee?) on her own two feet?

Here is the real story for today: How Girls Can Pee in the Woods and Keep Their Dignity

Find an appropriate spot. Off the trail is good. 100 feet from running water is also good. The spot should be secluded enough to give you privacy (like your own personal bathroom, without any walls).

Loosen your pants (I’m going to assume you are wearing pants) and start pulling your clothing paraphenalia down over your hips.

At the same time, squat. Bend your knees and stick your butt way out. Lean forward and rest your elbows on your knees.

By now, your pants and paraphenalia should be around your knees. DO NOT PULL THEM DOWN TO YOUR ANKLES. KEEP THEM AT YOUR KNEES.

Now. Feet apart. As wide as you can, remember, your pants are around your knees–not your ankles–and your butt is way out and you are leaning forward resting your elbows on your knees.

Finally, release the pee. Hopefully, the pee is directed at the ground and NOT at your pants or your shoes or anything else you have to wear.

That’s it. That’s the secret. Butt out as far as you can. Lean forward. It’s not really a dignified position, but I am not aware of a dignified position while trying to pee (especially in the woods!). Keep your dignity by not getting yourself (or your pants, boots, socks) wet.

This summer we had a party for my parent’s 40th wedding anniversary. Quite a few members of the family finally came to see what the Yukon was all about (after 30 years!!). At one point in time, I think there was seventeen people staying on or using my parent’s property.

Mum and Dad moved themselves into their camping trailer. They borrowed a tent trailer from Betrand and Therese and Nat, Darryl, and Chantel slept in that. Jorden and Jesse slept outside in a tent. Aunt Phyl, Aunt Barb, Aunt Midge, and myself all slept on the second floor of my parent’s two-story cabin. Uncle Bob and Aunt Ann slept in Mum and Dad’s room (downstairs). Redd, Jim, and Jim’s folks slept at the Flemming’s for the first few days.

We all ate together though. It was a big family affair. If you know my family–when we all get together–it’s all about food and feeding everybody. When one meal is over, we just start making the next. We even kicked Mum out of her own kitchen and took it over. Initially, she wasn’t too happy, but she got over it.

Mum wanted to have a special family meal the Friday everybody arrived. That Friday during the day, we sent Dad off on an errand and Mum off with her relatives to show them the town. Nat and I stayed home and cooked for the party the next day as well as the big family meal that night.

All day long. Chop. Cook. Clean. Chop. Cook. Clean. Chop. Cook. Clean. When it came to making dinner, I wanted to make my famous roasted potatoes. I started off by scrubbing all the dirt off each one. I think there were twenty in total. Then, chop, chop, chop into wedges. Toss in olive oil. Liberally sprinkle on some Montreal Steak Spice. Add freshly chopped rosemary. Bake in the oven. Incredibley simple. Really tasty.

I normally only do this recipe for one or two potatoes–never twenty. They weren’t baking fast enough. Everything else was ready: the BBQ, the salads, the desserts. We were all hungry but still waiting for the potatoes. And waiting. And waiting. I asked my aunts what I could do to make them cook faster. They said: Turn up the heat. I laughed and told them about how our German roommate made really incredibly tasty meals. His secret was add fat and salt. So. I told them, the secret to cooking for 17 or more people was: Add fat. Add salt. Turn up the heat!!

This phrase became the tag line for the whole holiday and, now, I think it is the secret recipe for a happy life:

How do you cook for 17 or more people? Add fat. Add salt. Turn up the heat.

If you are asked to comment on your holiday in the guest book at the visitor’s information centre in Dawson City, Yukon on a rather blustery, cloudy, misty day, what would you say? Add fat. Add salt. Turn up the heat!

How do you make a 40-year marriage work? Add fat. Add salt. Turn up the heat!

My family never had a TV until 1982. Even then, it was a simple, small black and white TV that sat on the kitchen counter. Dad told us we should use our imaginations to entertain ourselves. Besides, the entire world was out there for us to experience. We didn’t need to breed mediocrity by watching what everybody else was watching. If we couldn’t entertain ourselves with activity and we wanted to watch TV, he said, look out a window. If you want to watch something different, look out a different window.

A few years ago, some hooligans broke into my parent’s house. Of the things they stole were my parent’s TV and VCR machine. I remember talking to my parents about the break-in. Dad asked, what am I going to do without the TV? I laughed and told him, look out a window. If you want to watch something different, look out a different window.

I’m not a great photographer and don’t normally take snapshots on holidays just to say later on: Been there. Done that—the I-was-here-but-now-I’m-gone thing. However, on my recent trip North, I used some plastic figurines (Homies™, I discovered later) that I had aquired to take the touristy photos. It ended up being a lot of fun. These three Homies have been unofficially christened: The Little People.

Meet Hector (pants), Juan (chains), and Angelina Lopez (the “slightly fawning ‘Noma Countyite who appears somewhat imbalanced” just standing around with her hands in her pockets). She really was imbalanced. I spent most of the time trying to get her to stand up!

Here are my five favourite shots:

Having a coffee at Tim Horton's in Whitehorse, Yukon. Tim Horton's is Canada's signature fast food coffee and donut shop. Learn about the history of Tim Horton's on the web.

The second day on the Chilkoot Trail. We were hiking through northern coastal rain forest and my niece spotted this mushroom on the side of the trail. All that's missing is the hookah and the catapillar!

The fourth day on the Chilkoot Trail. 8 kms of track to go. These guys were just along for the ride.

Jack London's cabin in Dawson City, Yukon. Fireweed in the foreground. Fireweed is the floral emblem of the Yukon Territory. I'll have to make sure that I take pictures of them in Jack London's cabin in Oakland.

On the paddle wheel of the KENO in Dawson City. The Keno travelled the Yukon River between Whitehorse and Dawson City from 1922 to 1960.

Here is a link to all the pictures: Little People Gallery.

Seasons: Summer and Fall
Difficulty: Difficult
Activity: Hiking, Backpacking
Length: 39 Miles to Log Cabin

Day 0: 22 July 2005.

Highlights of the day: Whitehorse in the summer. Ride in Dad’s Zodiak up Miles Canyon.

Into Whitehorse by 10h00 am. My sister Redd, her husband Jim, and I go shopping to get food for this hiking trip. Down to grocery store. Salami. Cheese. Spam-in-a-bag. Peanut butter. We buy way too much. We have to carry it after all. But hey. I know how hungry you get on the trail.

Get home. Start setting up tents to see if we really need to bring two tents on the trail. Chantel (my eleven-year-old niece) arrives for a visit. Decide we are taking Chantel over the trail. Have to get permission from her parents who are in Alberta.

We eat dinner and laugh a lot. For some reason Dad says to Chantel: Eeww. You’re gross!! Chantel immediately replies: You’re ugly. We all laugh hard, including Mum. Decide to go for a zodiak ride up Miles Canyon and wait for response from Chantel’s parents.

Chantel can come! Kludge together gear for her to carry. Guess we are taking two tents. Go get her stuff from where she is staying. End up back at my parents by 10h00 pm to start packing. Chantel ends up taking my ultra-light thermarest. I end up taking Dad’s ultra-heavy thermarest. Finish packing for the trip at 1h00 am in the morning. Great start!!

Day 1: 23 July 05. 4 glaciers. 1 bear. Elevation: 3 feet.
“Worry is a waste of the imagination.” –A sign just outside of Skagway.

Drove from Whitehorse to Skagway. Left at 7h40 am Yukon time. Got to Alaskan border 9h30 Alaska time. Chantel is sitting on my lap in the car. We have the seat belt around both of us. At the border, our pencil-sized bear banger is considered a firearm. The surly border guard confiscates it. He says they don’t allow firearms to be brought into the USA. How weird that they allow semi-automatic weapons in the USA, but we can’t bring a pencil-sized bear banger.

Get to Skagway. Redd, Jim, and Mum take the Whitepass/Yukon railway ride up to the Canadian border and back. Dad, Chantel, and I stay in Skagway looking for interesting pictures I could take with my little people. I buy Chantel some hiking boots and hiking socks because I don’t really want to be responsible for a twisted ankle or painfully blistered feet. Redd, Jim, and Mum return. We try to see a movie on bear etiquette. End up seeing a movie on the Gold Rush of 1897-98.

Had dinner. Mum and Dad drive us to Dyea, take a picture of us and our humungous packs, wish us luck, and drive away. We set up our tents and get our food organized into the bear bins that are provided. Head up to the ranger’s station to register in the campsite. On the way back, Chantel and Jim are ahead of us and seem to be just hanging about. There is a black bear around the corner (just where our campsite is).

Another camper tries to run it off. We decide to tell the ranger. In the mean time, we decide not only to put the food in the bear bins, but also our packs since they have the food smells in them and we don’t want food smells near our tents with us in them.

Bear comes back into campsite after we are all in our tents. I call out to Redd in the other tent to see what she’s doing. I guess I somehow figure that if I’m talking from my tent the bear might think it’s a talking tent and not come sniffing too close. I decide that we should have our shoes on because I can still hear the bear snuffling about.

Ranger comes back to tell us that we should probably congregate at the outhouse as an alternative refuge from the bear. Ugh. Have visions of the four of us on our first night of the hike holed up in the stinky outhouse taking refuge from a stinky bear. Briefly consider taking refuge in the bear bins with our food and backpacks.

Eventually, ranger and local police officer from Skagway run the bear out of the campsite. It is now safe (HA!) to go back to our tents for one last restful, peaceful, night before the hike.

Day 2: 24 July 05. 12. 5 km. 2 glaciers. 8 very smelly socks. 24 bridges. Elevation gain: 247 feet.

Left Dyea campsite 7h00 am Yukon time. Left the Chilkoot trailhead at approximately 7h20. A few breaks to adjust the packs and adjust to having the weight on our backs. Pushed everybody to arrive a Finnegan’s Point for lunch. Black flies are incredibly annoying but only bite if you stay in one place too long. Arrived at Canyon City at around 4h00. We are completely knackered. Don’t know how we are going to make the Pass. Turns out that Jim may be dehydrated. Get him to drink more and more water. Or maybe he’s just delirious from the pain.

Vision of the day: Jim sits down on a log to rest. His pack is top heavy and keeps going. We turn around to see him&emdash;back flat on the ground with his legs in the air. No wonder he has a headache!

Quote of the day: Jim says to Redd: I married you to become rich and famous. Now look where I am! Chantel says: Suck it up, Princess!

Day 3: 25 July 02. 6.4 km. 1 glacier. 11 bridges. Elevation gain: 750 feet.

Left Canyon City at 11h30 because I repacked everybody’s pack to balance loads more efficiently. Nothing of note. No bear stories. Just pain. We only did 6.4 km and gained 750 feet. How are we ever going to make it over the Pass?

Day 4: 26 July 05. 14.1 km. 1 summit. 8 bridges. 1 bottle glacier water. Elevation gain: 2800 feet. Total elevation: 3800 feet.

Left Sheep Camp at 8h30 am Yukon time. Arrive Happy Camp 9h00 pm Yukon time. Lunch at the Steppes. Spicy beans!!! Booster Juice my sister calls them. Help in getting up the Pass! Eat more. We need all the help we can get.

Chantel and I go first. We are goats on the boulders. Redd and Jim carefully choose each rock. Whatever it takes I say. Whatever it takes. One foot in front of the other.

Jim gets all the kudos today. By the time we get to Happy Camp, people know who he is. He wears jeans and an industrial strength rubber rain coat up the Pass. He carries his pack on his back, carries his walking stick in one hand, and throws my sister’s pack up the Pass with the other. For every rock my sister climbs, he climbs three making sure she is on the right one!!! To top it off, he’s afraid of heights. Adrenalin he tells me later. Pure adrenalin.

Chantel cooks soup for us at the ranger’s cabin on the Canadian side. She is so grown up. No complaints from her. She’s a great sport. I collect glacier water from the spring at the top of the pass for a friend in California.

At Happy Camp, everybody is relieved that we made it. We can barely speak. We have exchanged a few harsh words on the trail. Our feet hurt. Chantel runs around gathering information from everybody there. When did they start? How long did it take them? Did they see the icky horse bones on the Pass? Were they relieved to see the Canadian flag and the ranger’s cabin? Wasn’t it a difficult trip? Weren’t we lucky to be here? Were they happy to be in Happy Camp?

I negotiate with her to do the dishes from lunch at the ranger’s cabin. She can sleep in 15 minutes the next day. I find out later she is down by the river doing dishes and crying her eyes out? I feel terrible. But. She did the dishes. She definitely contributed to the trip.

Day 5: 27 July 05. 25.7 Km. 3 mountain ranges. 8 extremely sore feet. ~15 pain killers.

Am in a very pissy mood today. Have never hiked out from Happy Camp to the Log Cabin, but know what it’s going to take. Hike 10 Km before lunch. Have another 15 or so to go before we get to the Log Cabin. But we know there are people waiting for us, so we go. Go. Go. Go. Let’s go, Chantel. Pick it up. I set the pace and think I’m doing fairly well. Redd and Jim keep up. Chantel says (late in the day): I can’t keep up with you on these hills Auntie. Can you slow down a bit?

I keep going. Let’s go. We have to hike to the bottom corner of that mountain over there. What’s worse is that the railroad tracks are at a slight incline. We are actually hiking uphill again. We slow down. Considerably.

We give Jim some more pain killers: Excedrin. Caffeine and pain killers. He uses the momentum of his pack to keep his legs moving. Swing to one side, lift leg. Swing to the other, lift the other leg. We tell him to say with each step: Beer. Real meat. Beer. Real meat.

Chantel asks if she can change into her pajamas when we reach the railroad tracks. I say she can do whatever she likes. She’s just hiked the Chilkoot Trail. Whatever it takes.

We break for a tiny bit. Jim keeps moving. Chantel follows. I stay with Redd to talk to keep her mind off her feet which are an incredible mess of blisters.

Suddenly, we see Chantel run ahead. She stops for a second, then continues to run. We immediately think Jim has fallen over and he can’t get up, but not the case. Jorden, Darryl, and Dad are on the tracks. They have hiked in to meet us.

Jim and Redd don’t give up their packs. Chantel and I gladly give up ours. Anybody who wants the weight can have it. Jorden (Chantel’s brother) takes her pack. Darryl (my brother-in-law) takes mine. Redd is determined to finish this hike. I think Determined (Stubborn??) is her middle name.

We get off the tracks around 9h30 Yukon time. We’ve been on our sore feet (and in Redd’s case, blistered beyond repair) for over 12 hours. Mum and Dad have sandwiches and beer for us at the cars. We get Redd off her feet. She’s shivering, dehydrated, exhausted, and slightly hypothermic I think. Get her shirt changed. Get a sleeping bag around her. Get her to drink some water and eat sandwiches. She’s Ok. Just a bit emotional at having finished.

We get home around 11h00 pm. Redd soaks in the tub. Jim eats real meat. I am just glad to be back. I take a shower before bed and discover it will take more than one to remove all the dirt, sweat, and grit. Tomorrow, I decide. Tomorrow.

My license plates arrived in the mail a few weeks ago. Today, I finally opened them and put them on my car.

I think this is terribly funny and weirdly appropriate. 867 is the area code for Whitehorse, Yukon AND I work in the telecom industry. I’m so pleased this plate simply arrived in the mail and the numbers were quite random but they mean something to me anyway.