Living Out Loud

Something Men Should Know about Women (or maybe just me)

A few nights ago, I went out for After Hours at the Ravenous Restaurant here in Healdsburg. That is, I went just to hang out and get a bit of conversation and meet some interesting people before I turned in myself. Ravenous is a local restaurant in an old house on Center Street. The entire backyard is the backyard patio and bar. It’s a pretty cool atmosphere. I like showing up later–you meet more locals (everybody who’s getting off of their shifts from somewhere else).

And if you know me and my Princess Donkey ways, I just start talking.

That night, I ended up talking to two out-of-town gentlemen who’d met one another at law school in London, England. One was living in Hong Kong now, the other–still in London. They were both here on holiday getting a bit of the California sun. They’d made it to Healdsburg after a few days in San Francisco. They were a bit tired, but they did ask where I could recommend they should go visit the next day.

I gave them an itinerary…based on nothing else other than the places I liked (but I did cross-check with a few other locals at the bar). I’ll eventually write that itinerary up and post it on HealdsburgMagazine.com (my other online home). But today, I was thinking about our conversation.

We somehow ended up talking about my favourite BBC series (the original OFFICE series, and something that’s showing on BBC America right now: Coupling). I tell them I think Coupling is the British version of Friends. AND IT IS SO MUCH MORE FUNNY. I laugh my head off at the dialogue. But, I guess that’s British and maybe more Canadian humour, not American.

I did say that I was a huge fan of the HBO series: Sex and the City. For a number of reasons: I like the writing in the series. It was daring, dashing, bold, and beautiful ALL AT THE SAME TIME. I could identify with almost everything that happened to every character in every episode. I also have a fetish for sexy shoes.

The guy from Hong Kong asked me which character I identified with the most. I thought about it for a second before I replied: “What you guys don’t get is that every woman is every character. We are all sassy, classy, smart, and sexy (Carrie, Charlotte, Miranda, Sam). Those four characters are the four cornerstones to each and every one of our personalities.”

That’s it. That’s what you have to know about us. You also have to understand when it is appropriate to start a conversation with any one of those four personalities.

I’m not really writing anything that Sex and the City fans don’t know. But if you’re a guy, and you’re reading my blog, and you’re not really a fan of the HBO series, I just wanted to let you know that fact.

Another thing I told them–about modern women today. We have jobs. We have careers. We work hard. We have our own salaries and financial portfolios. Some of us even own our own homes or residences.

I think who we’re looking for when we’re actually looking for a relationship is NOT someone who can take care of us. We can take care of ourselves. It would be good if YOU could take care of yourself and contribute to taking care of a household–yes, I mean cooking and cleaning and laundry and shopping and all the household tasks that your mother used to do.

The only part of us that we need you to take care of our hearts.

PS: It would also be good if you liked to dance in the living room.

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Comments (5)

  1. The four characters are the four cornerstones to each and every woman’s personality – and you’re expecting guys to understand when it is appropriate to start a conversation with any one of those four personalities?

    If you ever meet this mythical guy-thing, please let us know.

  2. Sorry, Jen – those may be the cornerstones of each and every City woman’s personality, but that doesn’t apply in the Yukon (and that’s part of the reason I moved here 20 years ago – the Sex in the City women are fun for a weekend but that’s about it). I know several women, including my wife, who also have rugged, independent, outdoorsy, artistic sides that a guy better know how to talk to, because those are commonly seen sides..

  3. Micheal, well. For example, don’t talk to Sexy Samantha in a professional environment. Don’t even think of making those types of comments. (AND you don’t seem like the type of guy to do that, but they’re out there and I still don’t know how to deal with them). Which is mainly what I meant.

    Sassy, classy, professional, sexy, and independent. I don’t know a woman (personally) who wouldn’t want those characteristics.

    Murray, you’re right. There are way more sides to a women (and I’m sure a man). Add outdoorsy, artistic, and creative.

    It’s best to find the common ground. But, because you both commented, you obviously get women (and have one as your life partners).

    Kudos