I’m calling my girlfriend in Yellowknife today. I’ve been calling her every Sunday for the last few weeks. She’s known me from forever. It feels good to talk to someone who’s known me forever. I feel grounded.
We’re talking about our lives and what we want our lives to be. We’re talking our old relationships and what happened. Although, we’re both over them now–over the relationship introspection thing. We’re talking about putting ourselves out there again. We talk about our expectations and what we perceive as other’s expectations.
She gives me homework assignments. Like last week, I was supposed to flirt. Ok. I thought. Hmmm. Flirt. That doesn’t seem so difficult. Get the flirt on.
Except. How the hell do you flirt? Maybe I’m not interacting with anybody I’d want to flirt with. Maybe an opportunity hasn’t presented itself. Maybe…maybe I’m just feeling so pressured–because it’s homework–that I just don’t see any opportunity.
Maybe I’m doing too many things that I don’t have any time to think about the idea of flirting. Flirting doesn’t come naturally to me. Or it doesn’t when I have to think about it. I know, because when I haven’t been thinking about it, I’ve gotten myself in a lot of trouble.
My friend says: Exactly Jennifer. That’s the whole idea.